returnjourneymemes | TEST DRIVE 002

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test drive meme

TEST DRIVE 002

RETURN JOURNEY: TEST DRIVE 002

Welcome to the Return Journey's test drive meme! We appreciate your interest. Our TDM features a small sample of events your character might encounter in game, which you're free to embellish or improvise with your own ideas as desired. Don't worry if you haven't read everything yet; while we recommend skimming our FAQ for relevant questions, critical information should be contained or linked within the prompts themselves!

TDM threads can be used as samples for applications. Players can mutually keep threads as game canon after being accepted into the game, though threads featuring non-canon squalls or events may need to be adjusted.

We suggest putting your character's name, canon, and potential role (warden or inmate) as the subject. If you're not sure which role you want to choose, feel free to try your hand at both!

If you have any questions about the TDM, please ask here.

1. Welcome Aboard!

Welcome aboard the SFS Peregrine, a ship in the Admiralty's Transformative and Penal Reparation Fleet. It is presently circling the outer perimeter of the Oos Ring Galaxy.

Wardens have been approached personally by the Navarch with a job offer: Come aboard the SFS Peregrine to assist in the redemption of an inmate, and receive a miracle known as a windfall as payment. Even if you don't ask as many questions as you should, every warden will be treated to a short Warden Orientation video explaining their expected duties and conduct.

Inmates have died and been placed aboard the SFS Peregrine as candidates for reformation. You may have come willingly, offered a choice between death or redemption, or you may have been collected against your will. Inmates are also treated to an Inmate Orientation; you'll find you have less privileges than a warden, but more motivation for...latitude. Violence? Chaos? Bribery? Blackmail? Well, no one said the path to redemption was without a few bumps along the way.

Given staff shortages, some wardens may be asked for a favor. Rather than leaving directly for the Peregrine, you've been asked to pick up an inmate from the limbo between death and redemption. During this mission, wardens will have clearance to enter a snapshot of sorts, where the inmate died (so devoid of other living beings). You either have to talk them into willingly coming along...or bring their unconscious, fresh-from-death not-corpse with you in the Avro provided. Better hope they don't wake up on the way!

Inmates, in this case, you'll be presented with the choice of death or redemption from a warden rather than the Navarch. Or possibly not provided with a choice at all, if death has rendered you unconscious. Good luck when you awaken to find yourself in a small ship, with someone you've never met. Try not to cause any trouble.

2. Pairings

Pairings are a critical aspect of the dynamic between warden and inmate. While interactions between wardens and inmates are not restricted to those in pairings, this relationship is a bit more...inescapable. Inmates test the limits of a warden, whether they take a more typical or unusual approach to matters; likewise, wardens learn what makes an inmate tick (and hopefully cooperate). Chances are, your values will clash.

A pairing of any sort is as varied as the individuals involved in them. And today, courtesy of the Navarch's monthly announcement, you and your sorry partner have been paired. Temporary or permanent, with a warden for an inmate or an inmate for a warden, it's your first day together — out of at least a month, so good luck setting some ground rules and figuring out each other's breaking points.

3. Life on the Peregrine

Hey, inmates! Ever gone to summer camp? Had a sibling? If so, you might see where this is going. If not, welcome to your first experience with shared sleeping arrangements!

The dorms are lined with bunks, though maybe they're better described as pods: futuresque capsules stacked two high, with sleek white paneling and cool blue LED lightning. Each bunk can be closed off with a sliding door privacy and boasts a bladeless fan for temperature control. Bedding is adequate. If such modest conditions do not appeal to you: consider not committing crimes against other people.

And just like with siblings or summer camp, you don't get a say in who your bunkmate is. Maybe you'll luck out and get a light sleeper who doesn't toss and turn in the night. Maybe you won't, and you'll end up with someone who will kill you if you snore. Whoever you get is who you're stuck with until further notice!

Wardens get much more hospitable quarters, but they may want to keep an eye out on the inmate dorms. Just in case an inmate does try to kill their bunkmate.

4. Squalls

Occasionally, the ship passes through squalls, the equivalent of cosmic turbulence that can mess with little things like, say...the fabric of reality. These are shipwide effects, though who they hit is variable. Sometimes you might fall victim; other times you might be the one standing by, exasperated, as you deal with those affected.

(In other words, it's up to player discretion. And feel free to make up your own squalls!)

This time around, the squall comes with an interesting side effect: whenever you lie or someone lies to you, you experience an immediate rush of anger — whether you consciously know someone is lying or not. Think of it as a temporary lie detector, but instead of being hooked up to a machine, you might punch someone in the face.

5. The Peregrine

The Peregrine's layout and protocols have been designed with its intended passengers in mind, who are primarily Earth humanoids and inclined towards certain social and cultural practices. If you're wondering why you are on a ship of Earth humanoids despite not being one yourself, please understand that all ships in the Admiralty have a population capacity. At times it may be necessary to assign other species to a ship of this type, based on availability.

As a warden, you have full run of the ship map. Inmates...less so, but that's nothing a little creativity can't fix, right? Just remember, if a warden catches an inmate somewhere that inmate shouldn't be, it falls on the warden to handle the matter. And if the warden turns a blind eye...well, let's hope neither of you get caught. While it won't result in anything as extreme as a demotion, wardens can expect to get a stern dressing down; inmates, meanwhile, will be reprimanded by the warden who found them.

6. Networking

Now that you've powered on your CommLink for the first time and sat through the short tutorial and appropriate orientation, you're ready to explore the wonders of messaging. Video, audio, or text, the world is your oyster and you surely have opinions on it.

There is no anonymous option and IDs must be some variation of your name. (IC, characters will have to try their luck and see what the communicator will or won't accept when they register; OOC, it's up to players to decide what name to use if the character has multiple names or aliases.)

Wardens have access to a group network filter, something that inmates lack, and can track inmates throughout the ship with their CommLink. Inmates, best avoid getting your device confiscated or monitored.

7. Wildcard

If it's in our game pages, you can use it as a prompt! The sky's the limit.

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"It's often not, when you're the patient," Lucifer says, knowingly. "Or when you're the prisoner, for that matter."

He smiles faintly. "I'm Lucifer. Like the Devil."

From his expression, the name and title clearly don't mean much of anything to him. The guy doesn't look like a tiefling, but what does he know?

"'kay. So, like, what did you do to get here?"

"Oh, I'm not an inmate here," he says breezily. "No, I was in my own sort of prison, until I decided to change things. I went through my own rehabilitation, and then I started helping others with theirs. I assume that's why Navarch approached me. It's kind of what I do. Except usually the people I help are already dead. You've got a leg up on them already."

"My man, I got some bad news for you on that front." Greyjay died. Or at least, he's pretty sure he did, and this is just the waiting room before that kicks in. "Pretty sure I kicked it back home."

"And, like, I dunno what kind of rehab they want from me?"

"You're here for a second chance," Lucifer says simply. "Self-improvement looks a little different for everyone. If you open yourself up to the process, we'll start figuring it out."

Greyjay looks as if he's just smelled something utterly foul. What kind of nonsense is this? 'Open yourself to the process'?

"...And if I don't? If I, say, suggest that you open something up and shove yourself sideways? What happens then?"

Lucifer grins. "I do sound like I have a stick up my arse, don't I? But, the only thing that happens if you refuse is that you don't get anywhere. You'll be stuck here, for some indeterminate period of time, perhaps Navarch will give up on you and dump you back to whatever afterlife you've earned for yourself back home, and that will be that."

He inhales. "And you'll be eternally stuck in whatever self-destructive cycle you've caught yourself in, probably. Or you can give it a try and see what happens then."

"I'm good with heading back to my planned afterlife. It's a big ol' nothing, and that's just peachy." Maybe there's some kind of other reality or world that awaits devout folk, or followers of other gods, but Greyjay knows where people like him go.

"But, hey, maybe you're not just naive or kinda slow. Maybe you've got that whole fool's wisdom thing going. How do you think I oughta move forward then?"

Lucifer is certainly unfazed by the insults. This kid reminds him a bit of himself, as a matter of fact. He always used to lash out with the insults when he felt cornered or exposed. Always acted superior when he felt adrift, or out of his element. Used to think he knew everything, certainly knew better than the people around him. Doctor Linda definitely got that crap from him sometimes. But she never spoke in platitudes. She always understood what she was saying, on a fundamental level, was true, and he would eventually see it. And he did.

"That'll require a lot more of you opening up to me, Greyjay. That's skipping at least four or five steps in this process!" He grins again. "Also it's never going to be my job to tell you what direction you should go in. That's on you."

"Hmmhmm." This guy sounds like he's recruiting for some sort of weird cult that's going to have him dancing naked in a field and cutting off parts of his body to appease some deity.

"You keep saying 'open up', but like, what does that mean?"

Luckily, Lucifer doesn't go in for worship of any kind, let alone the self-mutilation sort. Been there, done that, cut off his wings about a dozen times...

"It means getting to know you," he says simply. "Getting to know each other, really, as I've found trust to be a two-way street. It works best that way."

"'kay. I've got nothing to hide, so, I dunno, what do you want to know?" Jay frowns, unsure why this is something that seems important to Lucifer, but sure. Whatever.

Keep up, Greyjay! This is the ~process~. The thing is, most of the people Lucifer has helped already, were people he already knew. That's part of why he decided to take this on, really - to step out of that, hone his skills with people he doesn't know.

And they have to start somewhere.

"Why do you think you're here?" he asks. "This is a prison, and you're a prisoner. What do you suppose your crimes are, that you were chosen for this?"

He has a file, which Lucifer has skimmed, but he's not necessarily looking for objective facts right now. He wants to know what Greyjay thinks. What his perception is.

"Why I think I'm here and why I'm a prisoner are two different things." Again, he is pretty sure he is explaining basic concepts but who knows with rich people what they actually think the world is like.

"Prison is where you put people to get them out of the way, to stock an arena, because you can get some labour or entertainment of them before they fuck off this mortal coil." That's why there are people, like him, in this prison. "I am here because I got caught by the prigs running the show."

"Crime only leads to prison if you don't have the money to get out of it." Duh.

That - gets a laugh from Lucifer. A good, hearty chuckle. Oh, this kid is in way over his head.

"You honestly believe if you had some money, you could bribe your way out of interdimensional space rehab?" he asks, delighted. "Don't get me wrong - I appreciate the power of a bribe, I've done it many times, myself." He has, on more than one occasion, paid more money to bribe his way out of a speeding ticket than actually paying the ticket would've cost him. "Oh, we do have a long way to go. You're going to have to try to grasp the magnitude of this situation - you do know you're not in your own world anymore, yes? I can assure you, your world's money and your world's laws are completely meaningless to those in charge of this place."

"My man, anyone with enough money doesn't even need to bribe their way out; they just make the rules, or say their god makes the rules." It's only if you're poor enough to get caught that you have to pay your way out.

"And, yeah, I am aware that this isn't home, near home, or anything like it." So? What's your point?

"It's all very Mean Streets, I get the idea," Lucifer says with a faint smile, but the wheels are still turning. So this one's all about survival and blah blah.

What are the odds that whatever he did, that was his justification? Probably pretty high.

"Do you think that still matters once you're dead? Since you are dead." He said so, anyway!

"If I was properly dead, there'd be nothing and I'd be nothing. So, maybe this is the antechamber to that, but it's still lead and run by people." And people are, generally, pretty shitty.

"But, here's the thing, if this was a thing for everyone, something you get them to burn off 'crimes', you'd think it'd be more crowded."

He thinks he's got human nature nailed down, that's for sure. It's not that Lucifer would entirely disagree with him - no one has seen more of the shitty side of human nature than the Devil - but he's come to realize that most shitty people have stories. And sometimes, those stories are worth digging into.

"You make a good point," he agrees. "So do you have a theory, as to why you, and not a million other sods just like you? Random chance? Is there something special about you? Something only you can provide, to a place like this, dead or alive or otherwise?"

"Not a clue." As far as he knows, Greyjay isn't any different from any other Gallowsbait. "Bad luck? Poor timing? Whoever runs the show likes the look of me?"

"Why you, huh?"

"Mm. Well, I imagine I was asked to drop in because I've been doing very similar work in my home universe," Lucifer says. "Therapist to the damned."

Quite literally.

"You may want to consider what was told to you on your arrival," he adds after a moment's thought. "I'm not telling you what to believe - it's clear you've got some very deep-seated trust issues that we'll need to work on, and I know from experience that those don't go away overnight. But you probably shouldn't dismiss any possibility, even when presented by someone with an authoritative voice, just as you shouldn't always accept it at face value, either."

Greyjay is pretty sure this is all nonsense, but he's not about fight about it just yet. (Will he be a dick about it? Probably.)

"I haven't seen a single reason to actually trust anyone here." Another shrug. "Not your fault, not your doing, you got roped into this horseshit as well. You said that you were doing this work at home, so how'd they convince you to do this here? Didn't you have people back home? Somewhere better to be?"

"I suspect you've had very little reason to trust anyone your whole life," Lucifer says knowingly. He was in a similar situation, for a long time. It happens, when your family rejects you.

And, because he is always, always an honest Devil - and because building trust does require a certain amount of openness on the part of all parties involved, he answers honestly.

"I do have people back home. But I won't be able to see them again for a long time. So no, I have nowhere better to be. Navarch offered me the chance to help someone here, and I thought it was a good idea. An interesting challenge, and when I get back to my world and my patients, hopefully I'll be even better at helping them."

Go ahead and blast him with the fire of your cynicism, Greyjay. He can take it.

And there's the first time his expression slips from chatty or eye-rolling and settles on something cool and reserved. As he works on his next steps, Jay assesses Lucifer and considers what will get him the most benefit from this conversation.

"Good for you. Good for them. How did you or will you help them? What kinda people do you think they ought to be?"

Lucifer sighs. Well, it's at least not more sarcasm or cynicism. It's something. And hopefully, Greyjay does get some benefit from this conversation. That is the point, after all. To help him.

"All right, I'll explain this to you as best I can. My patients are dead humans. When humans die in my universe, it's not nothingness that awaits them. What happens to their souls depends on whether they have unresolved guilt from their actions in life. If not, they go to Heaven - it's pretty nice, if a bit boring. If they do have guilt, they drag themselves down to Hell, trapped in endless loops of self-torture. If they want, they can do therapy - with me. I help them face their guilt, their pain, whatever it is that eats away at them and sent them to Hell in the first place. When it works, they're able to get to Heaven. It's worked pretty well so far."

He points at Greyjay now. "You have an even better opportunity. If it works for you, you actually get a second chance at life. Pretty good deal, if you ask me."

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